Well, my family and I just moved out of the first (and only!) home we've shared together. It was bittersweet. We are ready for the next chapter in our lives, but that doesn't necessarily make leaving our house easy. My husband poked fun as I got all teary-eyed walking through the empty space one last time. As I was unpacking our things in our new space, I came across ALL of my files from the families I've served. I won't lie...I'm kind of a hoarder when it comes to these things. But how could I not be? The perinatal period is full of precious experiences. So many first moments, and so often we find ourselves asking the question, "Is this normal?" It's such a novel and exciting time. If we've worked together, you know how much I love to take notes at births. More specifically, I enjoy jotting down special words and gestures that make the experience unique, and reading the details really took me back! Still feeling very nostalgic from our move and here I was, crying again while skimming birth notes. My life is richer because of the families I've worked with, and I will always give thanks for the time I've spent with them. Here are just a few notes I wrote down that made me smile:
What are some of your favorite moments leading up to labor and birth? How did you feel holding your baby in your arms for the first time?
1 Comment
I exclusively breastfeed my son. It feels somewhat simple now but it wasn't always that way. Yes, feeding him is still challenging at times but it's nothing like it used to be.
6 months ago: I am a brand new mom. I've read many books and been around lots of breastfeeding women but I've never fed a kid myself. Nursing at home is awkward and nursing in public is even more awkward (for the both of us, really). My son doesn't know what he's doing and neither do I. He's tongue-tied and nursing every 1-2 hours. I'm using a nipple shield to help him latch and nurse more efficiently. I set alarms on my phone so that he doesn't miss a feeding. We're worried he's not gaining enough weight. It's 2am and my alarm just went off. So, I roll over and wake my sleeping baby. Turn on the bedside lamp. Grab my Boppy pillow. Reach for my nipple shield. Place baby on Boppy and proceed to stick nipple shield on my breast. Baby knocks shield off. I put it on again. My other breast begins to leak. I grab the nursing pad that's fallen out of my shirt while sleeping and stick it back in. After a couple of attempts, baby is on and I feel somewhat comfortable. My breasts begin to feel softer. I turn on Netflix and watch a show. After thirty minutes or so, my baby is fast asleep. I set another alarm from the time the feed started. I log our feeding time so I can track how often he's eating. I place my baby on his back and put all of my breastfeeding tools to the side. I grab a new t-shirt since the one I've got on is wet. I've caught on that my son typically needs a diaper change around 5am, so we'll wake up, put on a new diaper, and do this thing all over again. Today: We just celebrated my son's half birthday. When he's hungry, he shows cues that he's ready to eat, I pull out my breast, and he latches. It's never painful. I don't use a Boppy or a nipple shield. I've ditched nursing pads as I'm no longer leaking as much. He's teething. This means comfort nursing more often but his attention span causes him to pop off frequently. We like to nurse while baby wearing or in a dark, quiet room to avoid the distractions. Nursing in public no longer feels awkward. I've flashed a handful of people by now and I really don't care. I wake up to my son head-butting my chest and whining. It's about 4:30am, and he's trying to latch onto my shirt. Hold on, little dude. Let me unbutton my top. He whines louder because I'm obviously not fast enough at this. I present my breast to him and he latches on instantly. We nurse in the side-lying position in our dark bedroom. He begins to hum, grabs at my lips, and smacks at my chest. Pops off, rolls to his side, stares at the wall, and begins to jabber. Da, da, da, da, da, da. Rolls back to me, latches on, starts pinching the skin on my chest with his razor-sharp nails. I really need to cut those. He then pulls back from me and passes out on his back. All of this happens within ten minutes and we're both back to sleep. When I feel him rooting around my chest again, I open my eyes to see sunlight. It's 8:30am and he's ready to nurse and play. --------------------------- Breastfeeding mamas: There is a learning curve. Those first few weeks are hard. They're exhausting and confusing. Learning something new while you're sleep-deprived and sore seems almost impossible, but you can do it. Soon, your baby will be latching effortlessly. He will show off his flexibility as he pulls a heel stretch out of nowhere while you nurse him down for his afternoon nap. You will cough and he will pull off and give a big 'ol belly laugh. Because babies are weird and think that kinda stuff is funny. He will yell, "Na na na na na!" at you like, "Mom, I know you didn't just put me in this car seat. Nurse me NOW!" You will get him and he'll get you. In just one sitting, he will take in all sorts of new information through his senses while he is at your breast. It's pretty incredible to watch. The days when our babies are super tiny feel very long; however, that amount of time in comparison to the big picture is short. After those first few weeks, you'll know each other a little better. You will know his cues and he will trust you more. You'll get into a groove and find what works for you. There will be new hurdles along the way but you'll learn to adapt, just as you're doing now. It will get easier. Hang in there, mamas. You've got this. As human beings, we're resilient creatures. We are flexible and learn to adapt to a variety of situations- some easier than others. Exploring foreign territory tests our patience, our bravery, our knowledge and intuition. Isn't this what it's like when we give birth? Or as we embark on our parenting journey? I believe one of the best qualities to have in life is to be teachable. I have always been receptive to hearing new information and learning what's out there, but having a baby rocked my world a little bit (in a good way!). As a doula and childbirth educator, I was eager to experience labor and to have a child of my own. My education and professional experience helped me to feel prepared, though as most of you know, you never truly understand what it's like until you endure it yourself. Two things I was sure of going into this: 1) No two labors are the same. 2) Every baby is different. I say these things over and over again to clients and students. "It depends" is a regular phrase in my vocabulary as a birth professional. In the prenatal period, we learn what is "textbook" but understand that there's room for other stuff. I believe that the "other stuff" is what helps us become kinder, more empathetic and open-minded creatures. So, here we are...four months later with a baby who's learning new things everyday and teaching us, too. After a home birth transport, breastfeeding obstacles including tongue and lip ties, co-sleeping adventures, and a whole new perspective of time management, I feel good. I am very aware that I don't know everything, but I will learn as I go and trust my instincts. I don't fear change or the unknown; instead, I anticipate it and try my best to embrace it. My baby is my best teacher and the books, the classes, Google...they may have given me an *idea* of what this would be like but they don't replace the experience of being a new mom. On some days it feels like I can conquer anything that comes my way. Everything falls perfectly in place, and I feel so accomplished. Over the weekend, I couldn't help but feel oh-so-satisfied with how I was chugging along. But I can't take all of the credit--my baby was in a great mood, which makes everything easier to handle. I spent a good portion of the day at work on Friday. We had a full weekend of activities ahead of us, so I knew I'd have to hit the ground running when B and I came home from work. My brother recently turned 21 and we were all meeting up at my mom's for pizza and cake that evening. Yeah...that brother. Talk about feeling old. In three hours, I swept the house, washed dishes, did two loads of laundry (folded and put away!), made a birthday card, got presents together, scooped litter boxes...all while taking care of my 3 month old. Okay, so he was mainly sleeping and nursing in the Ergo. I love how babywearing helps me multitask! But I can't be on top of my game 24/7. In order to function well during those fast-paced days, I have to allow myself some down time. On my days "off," B and I may lounge in bed until 10am. I realize that once he becomes mobile, this will no longer be an easy option. I'm savoring these moments. I'll drink a hot cup of coffee. If my husband is home, he'll hang with B while I take a bath. Or if B is fussy, we'll take a bath together while I nurse him. I tend to things s-l-o-w-l-y. Sometimes it's hard to give myself the breaks I need to recharge. My high expectations for myself leave me feeling mentally and physically burnt out. Seriously, it's these days when I'm running around like a crazy woman and realize I haven't eaten in 5 hours. Please tell me I'm not the only one who struggles with this terrible habit. So, ladies....do this one thing for me. Take a look at this upcoming week and pick a day when you can carve some time out for yourselves. Find something that makes your heart happy. Get a pedicure, grab a drink with a friend, binge watch some Netflix, take a trip to Target sans baby. Walking up and down the aisles of Target never felt so good. Remember, you gotta take care of yourself before you conquer the world. Again. He wants to eat again. Growth spurts and developmental leaps can greatly influence baby's behavior. Somethin' big is happening with my babe this week. Luckily, his nighttime routine hasn't changed all that much. We crawl into bed around 11pm, nurse to sleep, and then he's up every 2-3 hours to eat until we get up between 8-9am. But everything leading up to 11pm is a little rough. This baby wants constant contact. I am thankful I can sit him down when we first wake up so I can make a pot of coffee and grab a quick breakfast (with both hands!). I'm also grateful that I have accommodating employment and don't have much else on my plate except for caring for my baby. He's growing every minute...and it's not just about weight gain or the fact he's 2 feet tall. He can follow my voice, lift his head, show emotion (happiness and discontent), and roll to his side (okay, maybe not purposefully). Oh, and I can't forget the cooing. Although our conversations are one-sided, he tries to talk back and often smiles when I joke around. How long until Mom isn't funny anymore? Luckily, I think I have a while. ;) However, with all of these changes comes nursing around the clock. Sometimes it's not even about being hungry. He just wants to be close and to comfort suck. The "baby eats every 2-3 hours" rule of thumb is thrown out the window-- no use in watching the clock. Pumping to build a stash of milk often feels daunting because baby is constantly at the breast. How can I pump if he's busy eating? Sometimes I awkwardly pump one side while he feeds on the other. Other times, I just don't feel up to the challenge. Of course, those last couple hours of the day, when I'd really like a moment to myself, are spent holding my half-asleep, barely sucking, fidgety, fussy baby. Mamas, this is hard. I'll admit--sometimes I feel trapped. I feel a little claustrophobic. I long for a date night with my husband or a night out with friends. I irrationally think to myself, "Well, that's never happening again." My sweet husband wears, bounces, and rocks our baby. He may even give our babe a bottle to give me "a break." But when it comes down to it, baby just wants to be at the breast. It's his happy place. My husband reminds me that this is temporary. This too shall pass. As exhausting as it is, it feels good to know I am needed. There will be a day when I'll look back at photos and think, "How was he ever that tiny?" I'll miss the constant cuddles, the belly-to-belly naps, and the nursing sessions where I just stare, observing his long eyelashes, his smell, and the softness of his skin. When my baby looks up at me and smiles, I know it's all worth it. Comparing myself to others. It's a dangerous thing in many ways and usually leaves me feeling inadequate. No one is perfect, but when I feel like I'm failing it's difficult not to focus on the bad. Working through labor, birthing babies, parenting children...these are not feats for the weak-hearted. And when you're in that vulnerable state of figuring things out, it's very tempting to ask, "Well, how does she do it?! How are they making it work but we aren't?" Having previous experience or knowledge on the said topic helps but does not guarantee a straightforward experience. Despite your level of experience or how much you think you know, I think it really comes down to attitude and, let's be honest, the cards you're dealt. Sometimes we're dealt really crappy cards. Have you done this two or three times already? It may be very different this time around. It doesn't always come naturally and when I say "attitude," I don't mean you gotta be 100% positive. It doesn't mean you're not entitled to feel exhausted, confused, angry, or just plain over it. It means that you do the best with what you have where you're at. Take a proactive approach. Getting your ducks in a row before baby arrives can help you feel more prepared. I am a firm believer that planning ahead helps me meet my goals. Reaching out for support and gathering resources is HUGE. Hiring a doula, taking classes, choosing a care provider that you feel comfortable with...these are all things that can potentially help you have the best experience. You can customize your preferences as you see fit, which will help you feel more at ease. Sometimes though, no matter how much researching and planning we do, we hit a few speed bumps or stray from our original plan. When this happens, it can be devastating. It may feel so overwhelming that you may not know what your next step will be. Hopefully, you have your people to lean on and your trustworthy resources close by. I also think it helps to: Validate. Remind yourself that this is hard work. Take your time. You are not alone in this. Remind yourself that you're doing your best. Or, maybe it's not your "best," but under the circumstances, you're doing a pretty darn good job. Breathe. Things will fall into place. Reframe. I am my toughest critic. What feels like failure to me may feel like success to others. Basic example: I was consumed by my grades in school. I always aimed for all As. I was a perfectionist, and it was a high expectation that I set for myself. If I landed a B, I was very upset. Others may have been very pleased with a B. Often, I needed to step back and look at the whole picture. "Okay, you got one B but four As," or "You weren't the only one who had trouble with that final." Pros vs. Cons lists really help me sort out my feelings, too. I can reason with myself and realize, hey...this stinks but it's not the end for me. It ain't all bad. Troubleshoot. Tell yourself what's done is done but ask, "How can I make this better?" Find your support people and talk with them. Process your experience and take time to acknowledge the feelings that you have- don't brush them under the rug. Find folks who have had similar experiences- you may learn from them and find comfort that they understand where you're coming from. Or you may want to sit down with a professional who can be objective, nonjudgmental, and who can help you navigate what's to come. Comparing ourselves to others cannot benefit us because it belittles our personal experiences. We're all doing what is best for ourselves, our babies, our families. You are different than your mother, your neighbor, even your best friend. Find what works for you and embrace it.
These are just a few things that I couldn't live without in those first weeks of the postpartum period:
What items were essential in your early days as a new mama?
The days before our baby B arrived, I woke up every morning thinking to myself, "Maybe today is the day!" and I would climb into bed every night thinking, "Well, maybe tomorrow." I knew my baby would come when he/she was ready (we didn't know the babe's gender) so I tried to distract myself as much as possible while waiting. I cleaned the house, organized the nursery, went to the gym, watched every episode of New Girl on Netflix, soaked in the bath while reading Ina May, bounced on my birth ball, drank lots of red raspberry leaf tea, baked the baby a birthday cake (lemon bundt cake to be specific--thank you, Pinterest!). I tried remaining positive, knowing this was a special time between my husband, J, and I. It would only be just the two of us for a little while longer, and soon we would be a family of three. It was a surreal concept that I couldn't quite wrap my head around, and despite it being unknown territory I was very excited. We planned to birth our babe at home with the help of a certified professional midwife. We also hired an amazing doula, who is also a close friend, to assist us at the birth. We rented a birth pool and did a couple of test runs to make sure we knew how to use it. I made birth affirmations and placed them on the wall behind the pool, knowing that these positive mantras would help carry me through labor. I made a playlist and day dreamed of bringing my baby earth side while the sweet and slow music played in the background. Our home birth supplies were neatly stacked in the co-sleeper that sat in our bedroom. I thought, "Any day now, baby. We're ready for you!" Day 1- On the morning of January 16 around 1am, I woke up to mild contractions. At the time, I wasn't calling them contractions as I didn't really know what 'contractions' felt like. Basically, I was really crampy. I would get up about every hour until 8am or so to pee and work through the crampiness. The cramps were mild enough that I was able to doze off once I climbed into bed. I continued on throughout the day with all of the activities that kept me busy throughout the week before (exercising, baking, Netflix binging, etc.) My contractions were spaced out but present throughout the day and into the evening. I had lost part of my mucus plug the day before so I knew something was happening. Day 2- Did the same damn things I did on Friday. Woke up frequently throughout the night due to crampiness and having to pee often. Cleaned the house and ran some errands. In the afternoon, J and I went to Gandolfo's for lunch. The seats were incredibly uncomfortable and hard. I was having consistent contractions and I'm sure people were starting to stare (No one else was deep breathing during their lunch!) J said I pulled it off like a champ, but I didn't believe him. We went downtown and walked up and down Kirkwood and stopped by Hartzell's for ice cream. Still very crampy, I thought to myself, "YES! It's happening. This baby is coming." By the way, there are a lot of cool celebrities born on January 17 so, naturally, I had an inkling today would be the day. Day 3- I'm still pregnant. I, again, woke up right around 1am on Sunday morning with those annoying contractions. I knew these contractions were helping my body prepare for baby but I was so over it. Up every hour but this time, it only felt good to sit on the toilet. I didn't want to move! I tried to stay in bed until 8am or so but I don't think I got much sleep. Is this cramping helping my cervix move forward? Helping it to thin and shorten? Am I dilating? My childbirth educator/doula brain would take over and I couldn't turn it off. I reminded myself that even if I couldn't sleep, it was important to rest as much as possible. I was hoping I was in early labor but didn't want to get my hopes up. J came home from training clients at the gym and brought me Cresent donuts for breakfast (yep, my husband/ personal trainer brought me donuts. That's love.) I continued to cramp throughout the morning, and later on, we decided to go back to Gandolfo's for lunch (the food there is good but you know, we had coupons to use up). Those seats!! They were so hard and uncomfortable. I had only taken a few bites out of my sandwich before realizing I no longer wanted to be at Gandolfo's. J offered to wrap up my sandwich while I went to the bathroom. I was having contractions every 2-3 minutes and they were lasting around 40 seconds each. I was also losing more of my mucus plug. Of course, I was all like, "Is this early labor? Active labor?!" I continuously had to remind myself to get out of my head and focus on the now. We drove over to the east side of town and walked around the mall for an hour or so. My contractions were still very close together, so we left the mall and went to Kroger to get some last-minute groceries. I felt so uncomfortable that I didn't want to go in and decided to sit in the car. Soon after my husband got out of the car I realized I could not sit still. I got out and leaned on the car, swayed my hips, and was squatting in the parking lot. Keep in mind this is the new, swanky Kroger that's always hoppin'. The waiting felt like forever and I was extremely eager to get home. I started to vocalize through my contractions and texted our doula once we pulled in the driveway. She recommended we both sleep as we would probably be up most of the night. Shortly after climbing into bed for a nap, my husband was out. Me, on the other hand...I couldn't get comfortable one bit. I was having a hard time coping but didn't want to wake him up so I ventured off to the opposite end of the house. I desperately wanted to get in our bath tub but knew that water would not help speed up labor until I was in the thick of it. Being immersed in warm water in early labor can slow down or stop your contractions. I decided it was more important that I try to catch up on rest than focus on making contractions more progressive. Our doula arranged to be over by 7pm. I was very emotional and cried to J when he woke up. He calmed me down, reminded me that I was doing a great job, and that our doula would be there soon. When our doula arrived, I was in our dimly lit bedroom moaning and swaying. She encouraged me to do some lunges and offered me sips of water. I moved to the toilet where she propped me up with pillows and rubbed my back. It was starting to hurt but in an unusual way-- like it was pulling from underneath my ribs. I soon realized I had pulled a muscle and thought it may have happened while in the tub. Soon after, I began throwing up. I thought, "Yes. Bring it on! I'm sure this puking is helping me open up." Our doula contacted the midwife and updated her on what was happening--she said she would be over soon.
It was around 1 or 2am when my midwife suggested I whip out my hand pump. My contractions were still very strong but had spaced out immensely. I remember feeling so drowsy in between surges-- I would wake up at the peak of them and barely be pumping, the pump itself almost falling out of my hands. Dude, I am so tired. I hadn't had a great night's sleep since Thursday and looking back, I think I am sleeping better with my newborn than I did the weekend I went into labor..I was *that* tired. My midwife told me that I was doing a great job and that I should go get in my birth pool. Oh, I was so happy to hear that. My doula went into the back bedroom to catch up on sleep and my midwife stayed in the living room while J and I ventured into the bedroom where the birth pool sat. He sprawled out on the bed as I sat at the edge of the pool, my top half draped over the side. Soon, the whole house was sleeping. With every contraction, I whispered things like, "C'mon, baby" and "Ooooopen." This really helped, as cheesy as it sounds. Still, my contractions were very spaced out. The water really took the edge off of my back pain and the pressure I was feeling down low. I stood up a couple of times in the pool just to make sure the intensity of the contractions was still there. Oh boy, was it ever. I think I had been in the pool for an hour or so before I climbed out, wrapped a towel around me, and walked back into the living room. My midwife, as sweet as ever, asked, "What's up, darlin?" I told her I wanted to be checked and I wanted to know the number. I *needed* to know if I had made any progress. She told me I was at 5 cm. (hooray!)...but I was 5 cm. when she first checked me (noooo!). I felt so discouraged. I didn't feel as if I was suffering, but I honestly didn't know how much longer I could keep at it. I was so tired and more often than not, my back hurt worse than the contractions. I was having a hard time coping and hated the thought of being checked again, hours later, to find my cervix hadn't changed. I couldn't understand why my contractions were so far apart--I couldn't relax enough to fully sleep and yet everything we had tried to bring contractions closer together was not cutting it. And then, like word vomit, I remember blurting out, "I want an epidural. I think I want to go to the hospital." I never thought I would say that. I dreamed of birthing our baby at home. She agreed that my body may benefit from some pitocin and that she would support me, whatever choice I made. It was reassuring to hear that, just like I was thinking to myself, this is not characteristic of a straightforward labor. My baby had been LOA for the past couple of months but maybe something else was going on. I woke up my husband and told him that I wanted to go to the hospital. I apologized over and over again. He consoled me and helped my doula and me pack a bag. My midwife called into my back-up physician to let him know we were coming in. The ride to the hospital was the absolute pits. We parked in the emergency parking garage and I waddled up to the labor and delivery floor. The nurses asked the annoying, but necessary, questions upon admittance as I sat on a birth ball and leaned over the side of the hospital bed. My back still aching, I asked J to use some counter pressure and hold a warm rice sock against my lower back. Lab came in to draw my blood and I was hooked up to IV fluids. I was informed that the anesthesiologist was at home (I knew that was coming!) and I waited around two hours for him to get there and administer the epidural. Once it was in place, we all rested for a few hours. The epidural brought so much relief-- even the pain from my pulled muscle was gone. It was incredible! My doula went home and we told her we'd call when things started to progress. I found out that one of my friends would be working day shift and requested for her to be my nurse at shift change.
The nurse and nurse midwife started to set up the room for birth, and I got into a side-lying position. My midwife supported one of my legs while my husband stood by my head, offering sips of water between pushes. My doula quietly snapped pictures of the whole experience. As he crowned, I reached down and touched the top of his head. He's really coming out! Finally! The nurse midwife asked if I wanted to bring him up onto my chest and I happily said, "Yes!" In less than an hour, he was here. I reached down to bring him up to my chest as "Heavenly Day" by Patty Griffin was playing...it was a moment I will never forget. B was born with a nuchal hand (left hand up by his face), which is what probably caused my terrible back pain. 8 pounds, 11 ounces and 21 inches long...born at 1:34pm on MLK, Jr. Day. I'm not quite sure how he ever fit inside me--the things a woman's body is capable of are truly amazing. Despite our transport to the hospital, I had a wonderful birth experience. I felt fully supported the entire time and had the dream team by my side during delivery. I was able to advocate for myself. I was listened to and treated with respect. I am thankful for the tools the hospital offers that are not available in the home setting-- they can work wonders when you need them. Maybe next time we'll birth our baby at home, but right now, I am content focusing on our new, amazing son. I'm grateful that both my baby and I are healthy, that there were no major complications, and that I've had a smooth postpartum recovery. Birth is an unpredictable life event that you will remember forever, but it's only the beginning of something much, much bigger. My heart is whole as I sit here typing our story and nursing my little guy. I can't wait to see what the future has in store for us. It was a cold and gray Sunday afternoon. I lit a couple of candles (Crossroads Caramel Apple makes the whole place smell divine), tidied up a bit, and hopped on Spotify for some mellow music. Two friends, Amy and Leah, arrived at my house early with flowers, food, and beautiful fabrics and decorative pillows. It was the day of my mother blessing. Mother blessings are customized, sincere, and full of love. Don't get me wrong-- baby showers are fun. Showers involve silly games, tons of baby products, and most importantly…cake. But baby showers and mother blessings are very different from one another. It's at a mother blessing that we celebrate a woman becoming a parent. Close friends (primarily women) of the mother gather around to help mama prepare herself for birth and motherhood. At this gathering, we do not lose focus on this new being that will soon be earth side, but we take the time to recognize how this little human will change the woman as a person. Although mama may be given birth and postpartum gifts, it's not about consumerism and products and all that fluff that's typically paired with baby's arrival. This ceremony is about sisterhood and community. Feeling connected and supported as a new mom greatly affects the postpartum period. How could it not? The mother blessing ceremony includes activities that acknowledge this time of growth and the new role the expectant mother will soon take on. Every gathering is sacred and will look different depending on the mama's needs and desires. I believe we should celebrate every mama and parent this way as they enter into this exciting, and sometimes overwhelming, stage of life. At the end of the day, I felt full. Full of gratitude, acceptance, and intuition. These women remind me to trust my body and my baby. They encourage me and tell me that I am enough--that whoever this little being is, he/she will love me through and through. No matter how new or lost we feel in parenting, we all have innate abilities and characteristics that guide us in our experience. And when we have a hard time believing in ourselves, our village of people will be there to lean on. To acknowledge the struggles, the triumphs, and the "holy shit, we made it through" moments. I'm so very thankful for my village. If you are interested in putting together a blessing ceremony for a friend or would like more information, please contact Leah Rose Hagen of Birth Journey Doula Services. She is sure to help you have the best experience possible!
How is the third trimester going, you ask? Let me tell ya... 1.) Aches and Pains
To be fair, I feel pretty darn great. Many mamas have reported to me that they didn't feel so hot in the third trimester (some even sharing their "I was SO miserable" stories). I've still got about 6ish more weeks to go, so you know, things could change. I know that I will be anxious, big, and ready to get things over with in those last few weeks. Around 31 weeks, I began experiencing inner thigh/pelvic pain. I upped my stretching and Spinning Babies exercises (see below) and have been seeing a massage therapist once a month. Around 33 weeks, I felt so much better. It's still a little hard to get out of bed sometimes but it feels much more manageable than before. Side note: Prepare yourself if you're planning to go to the movie theater in the 3rd trimester. It's nearly impossible to get comfortable in those chairs. Kind of ruined Hunger Games for me. Actually, what ruined that movie was the twist and abrupt ending. Really, Peeta? 2.) Baby's positioning This is probably on my mind more often than other mamas' because I'm involved in birth work. Positioning plays a much bigger role than the estimated size of your baby, and head down is not enough! Take a look at the Spinning Babies website to get an idea of where your baby is at, as this will influence labor and birth progress. I'm always talking out loud to my baby, asking things like "Is that your butt?" and commenting on how his/her hiccups feel on the outside. My husband doesn't even take a second glance when I do the inversion, unannounced, on our living room couch. 3.) Where is my crotch? I'm seriously asking because I can't see it anymore. Not unless I'm looking at myself in a mirror anyways. I guess I should've expected this but it's just one of those things you don't really think about. 4.) The "I'm growing a human" realization Holy shit, there really is a person in there. This is amazing. It feels more real each day when I wake up. I think to myself, "I'm one day closer to meeting this little soul." We've been working on the nursery more and even though we really don't plan to use it that much, at least in the beginning, it is helping me transition into this new phase of life. Decorating and organizing is definitely satisfying my urge to nest. 5.) Sleeping positions I added a nest of pillows to my sleep environment in the 2nd trimester so that's nothin' new. I always favored sleeping on my stomach so it was quite an adjustment when I could no longer do that. But lately, I've been finding myself asleep on my back. I wake up and think, "How long have I been here?!" I'm almost positive this is a result of me pancaking from side-to-side in my sleep, only to get lazy mid-pancake. Sleeping on my back was not even comfortable before I was pregnant and yet, here I am every night, finding myself asleep on my back. 6.) Reconnecting with partner My husband and I signed up for childbirth education classes at BABS and it's been so much fun. Most nights, we have just enough time to eat dinner and watch a little bit of television together; however, our past five Wednesdays have been spent hanging out, learning new things about birth/parenting, and discussing our future. I know I'll fall in love with him all over again when I see him hold our baby for the first time. 7.) Head colds Oh, I endured a terrible head cold last week! When people say, "Being sick in pregnancy is the worst!" they really mean it. The good news: you're already up every couple of hours peeing anyways. It's not like you're losing that much more sleep, but your sleep positions are that much more limited. I was practically sitting up while sleeping so that I could breathe! 8.) Sex It's still fun, but a little uncomfortable. Not in a "this doesn't feel good" type of way, but more like "what the hell do I do with this belly?" Like sleeping with a cold, your positions are a bit limited. You're also either really excited for sex (these pregnancy hormones are no joke) or you're so tired you just wanna crawl into bed and sleep forever. I can't speak for everyone, but I think it's pretty normal for your sex life to change in pregnancy. Not for better or worse necessarily...it's just different. 9.) The battle between narcolepsy and insomnia Usually, I have no problem going to sleep at night. Aside from my husband's snoring, I find that I fall asleep more easily than I did pre-pregnancy. But every once in a while, I just can't sleep. Netflix, a hot cup of tea, reading...nothing does the trick. The funny thing is that every day, midday, I think to myself, "I could really take a nap right now." Napping always feels great and yet there are evenings when sleeping is just not on the agenda. Okay, I'll stop complaining about sleep because there are sleep deprived parents reading this that probably want to kill me right now. 10.) I'm still crying I'm still as emotional as I was in the 1st and 2nd trimesters. I guess I'm not surprised as I'm a pretty emotional person anyways. But it feels heavier than when I was crying pre-pregnancy. I can go from 0 to 10 in seconds. Like I said, pregnancy hormones are crazy. I'm so thankful my husband is understanding of this. Keep in mind the season finale of Parenthood is right before my due date. That is gonna be a night full of crocodile tears. |
Archives
July 2019
Categories
All
|